Thanks For: The Colonoscopy Diet – Who’s Up for Round 2?

Dear Father Who Tried to Get A Colonoscopy he wasn’t scheduled for,

Just when you think that invasive medical tests couldn’t get more hilarious, they come roaring back with a vengeance. Guess who did all the prep and then found out that he didn’t actually have the test on the day he thought? That would be my Father. Oh Dad. Dad, Dad, Dad. I’m sorry that I laughed when I got home and you told me that actually your colonoscopy was next week. I’m sure that’s sad and unfortunate and you went on that diet and did all that human waste excreting for nothing. It’s possible that I just lost my ‘most supportive daughter of the year’ award.

But only you could do the colonoscopy diet twice for a single test.

I wonder what the nurse thought when you went wandering into the doctor’s office insisting that you had a test that you weren’t booked for? I checked when I got home. That paper clearly said the right date. I guess you were just so eager to get the whole thing over with that you pushed it forward mentally. You’re a big boy. Mom’s too busy keeping track of Hedgehog and finding you edible pre-colonoscopy approved food to worry about your date double checking.

Now you’ve got to do it twice.

This of course, means that I get a second round of eating muffins in front of you and watching you slowly die inside (see The Colonoscopy Diet Part 1). It also means that mother will be putting us all back on the colonoscopy diet. Great. More fish and colourless/spiceless food. Just what every girl wants. On the other hand, I’m thankful that I”m not the one actually getting the test.

So dear Father thank you for the laughs. I’m sorry that your mixed up plight struck me as hilarious.

At least you know what to expect this time,

Aria

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