Dear Fashion Designers of Office Attire,
Is it so hard to put a set of functional pockets on a pair of pants? Heaven forbid the practicality factor get in the way of your design. Those two little slits and a patch of extra fabric are certainly going to ruin absolutely everything. How dare I require a place to put, say, my cell phone. Pshaw. Who needs to carry that around?
Even better dress pants with fake pockets. They look like pockets, they sounds like pockets, sometimes they even have fabric just like pockets should. But no pockets. It’s just a trick to make you think that pockets are available. Pants like these belong in the same category as pantyhose – evil limb garmets.
But this blog is about happy thankful things. Hold it together Aria, find your happy place. Oh wait, what? I forgot my happy place at home? MAYBE IF I HAD POCKETS I COULD HAVE BROUGHT MY HAPPY PLACE WITH ME.
However, if you’re a pair of dress pants with pockets. Hello darling. Even if you’re the kind with real pockets that have been stitched together just in case you wanted fake pockets
like a crazy person, I love you and am willing to take those stitches out. The joy of putting my hands in my pockets, stashing my iPod on my person, secretly carrying mints around for long meetings. It’s a beautiful thing.
All pants should have pockets. All clothes should have pockets. Should the day come I will work really hard to get a wedding dress with pockets.